“Authors can’t use it in fantasy fiction, eh? We’ll see about that…”
–Terry Pratchett, probably
Try to implement anything but a conservative’s sixth grade education level of medieval or Victorian times and you will butt into this. all. the. time.
There was a literaly fad in the 1890′s for nipple rings for all genders(and NO, it was NOT under the mistaken belief that it would help breastfeeding–there’s LOTS of doctors’ writing at the time telling people to STOP and that they thought it would ruin the breast’s ability to breastfeed well, etc). It was straight up because the Victorians were freaks, okay Imagine trying to make a Victorian character with nipple rings. IMAGINE THE ACCUSATIONS OF GROSS HISTORICAL INACCURACY
people just really, REALLY have entrenched ideas of what people in the past were like
tell them the vikings were clean, had a complex democratic legal system, respected women, had freeform rap battles, and had child support payments? theyd call you a liar
tell them that chopsticks became popular in china during the bronze age because street food vendors were all the rage and they wanted to have disposable eating utensils? theyll say youre making that up
tell them native americans had a trade network stretching from canada to peru and built sacred mounds bigger then the pyramids of giza? you are some SJW twisting facts
ancient egypt had circular saws, debt cards, and eye surgery? are you high?
our misconception of medieval peasants being illiterate and living in poverty in one room mud huts being their own creation as part of a century long tax aversion scam? you stole that from the game of thrones reject bin
iron age india had stone telescopes, air conditioning, and the number 0 along with all ‘arabic’ numbers including algebra and calculus? i understand some of those words.
romans had accurate maps detailing vacation travel times along with a star rating for hotels along the way, fast food restaurants, swiss army knives, black soldiers in brittany, traded with china, and that soldiers wrote thank-you notes when their parents sent them underwear in the mail? but they thought the earth was flat!
ancient bronze age mesopotamia had pedantic complaints sent to merchants about crappy goods, comedic performances, and transgender/nobinary representation? what are you smoking?
Truth is stranger than fiction, and history is weirder than you think.
this post gets better every time it comes across my dash. To provide some more: those Romans also had vending machines, automated puppet plays, doors that opened to the sound of horns when you lit a fire in front of them, and working steam engines. All invented by one dude, Hero of Alexandria.
So there’s been a lot of discussion floating around regarding billionaires and society, and I’ve noticed that most people have no idea what a billion dollars is for practical purposes – people tend to think of it as a vague, nebulous concept of “a lot of money” rather than something concrete you can wrap your head around. This is understandable, considering 1) a billion of anything is really hard to visualize and 2) the average person has no real reference point for an amount of money that large. So I’m going to try to break it down for everyone:
Okay, so imagine you have a billion dollars. What can you actually buy with that?
This is a mega mansion that will have an Imax cinema, a bowling alley, and a spa when it’s fully complete. It costs around 4.6 million dollars.
Now let’s buy one of these in every country in Europe – that’s 50 mansions you now own. So how are you going to travel between all your many homes?
This is a Bugatti Veyron Super Sport, the fastest street-legal car in the world. It has a maximum speed of a face-melting 254 mph and can go from 0 to 60 mph in 2.5 seconds. It costs around 2.5 million dollars.
Let’s buy a dozen of them – you know, in case you total a few of them racing around the highway. But maybe a sports car is still to slow for you:
This is an Embraer Lineage 1000. It’s private jet that can seat up to 19 passengers, and we’re going to buy it for 53 million dollars.
How about a boat? The Tatoosh is a 303 ft private yacht, meaning it’s longer than a football field. We’ll take it for 369 million dollars.
Now that we’ve gone on our ludicrous and absurdly wasteful shopping spree, how much money do we have leftover? About 12 million dollars, which is almost an order of magnitude more than the average American with a bachelors degree or higher earns in a lifetime ($1.8 million). So if you for whatever reason decided to buy the 50 houses, 12 sports cars, plane, yacht, art pieces etc. and immediately set them all on fire, you would still have enough cash leftover so you never would have to work again if you so chose. This is what it means to be a billionaire.
But we’re not done yet.
The richest person in the world is Bill Gates, with a net worth of 86 billion dollars. If he liquidated his assets, what could he buy?
Well, for starters, the Burj Khalifa – the tallest man-made structure in the world at 2,722 feet tall, costing around 1.5 billion dollars.
The Large Hadron Collider, the world’s biggest and most advanced particle accelerator for 9 billion dollars.
The Hubble Space Telescope for 10 billion dollars (including 20 years of operating costs).
The Three Gorges Dam, the largest power station in the world, more than a mile wide.
And to top it all off, a fleet of five Nimitz-class aircraft carriers, the largest military vessels ever built for around 8.9 billion dollars each. If you look at the picture very closely you can see the people standing on it for reference.
If Bill Gates bought all of this, he would still have around 2.3 billion dollars leftover. That’s enough to go on the billionaire shopping spree I described above twice over (so 100 mansions, 24 sports cars etc.) and still have hundreds of millions of dollars in the bank when it’s all said and done.
But we’re not done yet.
Currently, it’s estimated that there are 2,043 billionaires alive today, with a combined net worth of around 7.67 trillion dollars.
This is Russia, the largest country in the world, extending more than six and a half million square miles, with a population of more than 144 million people. The United Kingdom could fit inside Russia 70 times.
In 2016 Russia’s gross domestic product was about 1.28 trillion dollars. This means that if the two thousand and some odd richest people in the world – less than half of 0.1% of 0.1% of the Earth’s population – liquidated and pooled their assets together, they could buy every single product and service made in Russia for almost 6 years.
So yeah, make of that what you will.
1 YEAR UPDATE
So it’s been just a little bit over a year since I’ve made this post, and holy shit I didn’t expect it to get so many notes… anyway thought I’d make an update. First, a few responses to common criticisms I noticed:
“That house costs more than you said it costs”
I provided sources for everything, I can’t click on the links for you broski.
“The map of Russia is incorrect”
Strange, my bad… didn’t notice until after I posted that the map I used includes Belarus and a few other countries as part of Russia, no idea why they did that, I should have picked a better map.
“Net worth somehow doesn’t count as worth because not all of it is literal stacks of cash”
First of all I distinctly specified that my figures were based on if said billionaires liquidated their assets, but more importantly that’s like sitting on top of a pile of solid gold bars and claiming you’re totally broke because you can’t use them at the supermarket. Seriously, this is just asinine.
*Insert impassioned defense of capitalism here*
Now if you follow my blog it’s pretty obvious that I’m a leftist, but something I did very deliberately for my billionaire essay was try to avoid ever mentioning left politics or making any moral judgements, i.e. more or less everything I wrote in that post was just objective, inarguable facts. I very intentionally ended the essay with “make of that what you will,” without ever actually commenting on whether the situation was good or bad. If you consider yourself a capitalist and want to remain consistent with reality, you really shouldn’t be offended by this post. If your first response upon looking at a neutral series of data points is to immediately rush to defend the system that produced it, it means you instinctually realize something is terribly wrong and you’re trying to justify it. Just saying, not a good position to be arguing from.
ANYWAY
As of the time of this update, Bill Gates is no longer the richest person in the world; the title now belongs to Amazon’s Jeff Bezos with with a mind-blowing $147.7 billion. Now, what could he actually do with all of that? Let’s make a list!
End Homelessness in America
There are an estimated 553,742 homeless people in America. Jeff Bezos could hand every single one of them $50,000 cash for
$27,687,100,000, which should be more than enough to get a roof over your head for a decent amount of time.
Give 100,000 students a full ride to Harvard
Going to Harvard University will cost a student about 60,659 a year including tuition, room and board, and various other fees. Paying for a full 4 years for 100,000 students would cost
$24,263,600,000.
Buy Iceland for a year
The gross domestic product of Iceland is currently about $23.9 billion dollars, which means for that amount Jeff Bezos could buy every single product and service produced in the country for an entire year.
Fund every US national park for 10 years
This year’s budget for the national park service will probably be about $2.7 billion, so 10 years of funding would be $27 billion.
Give every Amazon worker a $20,000 bonus
Jeff Bezos has
563,100 employees working for Amazon. He could give each and every one of them a $20,000 bonus for $
11,262,000,000.
End world hunger
It would probably cost around $30 billion to ensure that no person in the entire world suffered starvation and malnourishment this year.
And how much does Jeff have left?
After doing all of that, Bezos would still have upwards of $3.5 billion left over, which is not only far, far more money than a single person could ever spend on themselves, it also would mean he still gets to remain substantially richer than most other billionaires.
Ok so I rly fucking need to clean my house. Do any other People With Depression™ have any tips or ways you motivate urself to clean? Because this feels like the hardest goddamn thing in the world even tho I know it’s not and I’m just continually frustrated with myself and have been for the past two weeks.
HOO BOY DO I HAVE DEPRESSION/EXECUTIVE DYSFUNCTION CLEANING TIPS
in no particular order (because I have depression and executive dysfunction):
1. If something sensory about cleaning bothers you, eliminate that before you start. For example, I wear gloves to do the dishes. If the sound of the vacuum bothers you, wear headphones and turn up the music. etc.
2. If you can, make a list of everything that needs to be done. Then acknowledge that you probably can’t do it all, and circle all the things that absolutely, no matter what, have to be done. Pick one (ONE! ONLY ONE! START WITH ONE!) of those things and break it down into smaller steps. Then even smaller steps. Seriously, if step one is “stand up” and step two is “walk to closet” and step 3 is “get mop”, that’s fine. It can be that small.
3. Take a break. “But I literally only started five minutes ago!” Don’t care. If you want a break, take a break. “At this point I’ve spent more time on breaks than I’ve spent on cleaning.” Ok, but you’ve spent more than zero time on cleaning, so you’ve accomplished more than you had at the beginning. “If I take a break it won’t get done!” If you burn out it won’t get done either. Take a break.
4. If nothing is working, try what I call bin cleaning/box cleaning. Take a big trash bag and a box. Pick up the first object you see. Step 1: Is it trash? Put it in the trash bag. Step 2: Will you use it in the next 2 days? No? Put it in the box. It’s a problem for Future You. If you’ll use it in the next 2 days, take time to put it away. Rinse and repeat.
5. Did you get distracted and forget what you were doing? Don’t worry about it. Just clean a thing. It doesn’t matter if it’s the thing you were cleaning before. You have to clean lots of things, so just pick a thing and clean it. Eventually you’ll get around to the thing you forgot.
6. If you have to do a thing you really hate, do a thing you like afterwards. I hate doing dishes, but folding laundry soothes me, so that’s a nice one to do afterwards. YMMV. If there are no cleaning things you like that you can do afterwards, see number 3.
7. Make it fun. Play loud music and dance while you’re cleaning. Wear something that makes you feel cute, or if you prefer, something comfy. Light your favorite candle. Whatever.
8. If it’s nice out, open a window. Seriously, it helps.
I haven’t seen this post in a min but precisely when I have a headache RN it comes up in my feed
Two quick additions, as someone who suffered from chronic migraines
1. Behind the eyes: eye strain or just long stress. More sleep will definitely make this feel better. 2. Temples: unclench your jaw, as that bone is putting too much pressure on your temples.
This is a fucking life saviour with the amount of headaches I have
Hey, all! I thought I’d share how I use OneNote, for any students who might want to use it for school organization. I have used this since the beginning of my university career and have found a method that works for me, after nearly three years.
I provide templates for what I use as .one files that can be imported into OneNote, and you’re free to use & modify them however you wish.
As a student with learning disabilities, I found that using a computer, rather than writing everything out, is the best method for me to learn. I type up notes in class so as to not worry about keeping up with a professor, handwriting, or neatness. OneNote is my favourite note-taking application for this, because it’s essentially an upgraded version of Word that’s free and syncs automatically across devices. When my computer crashed, I was still able to access my notes online.
OneNote isn’t all typing. You can use it on a tablet or use a drawing tablet, in my case, to handwrite notes for a more natural feel. A very efficient way of taking notes is to import the lectures slides in OneNote and to write directly on them. I found that very useful in math-heavy courses, such as statistics and chemistry. The equation tool, while nifty, isn’t efficient.
By no means whatsoever is this the only way to use OneNote! In fact, I’d recommend you find a way that works for you, because while this may be highly organized, it takes a bit of set-up time and is tailored specifically to my needs. You can use my example as inspiration, but play around with it! The beauty of OneNote is that it can be used in a variety of different ways.
okay @chigrima@silvysartfulness I need you guys to help me out: what are the actual Swedish phrases AND WHAT DO THESE MEAN?!
@chigrima is probably replying to this as I type, but that only means you get twice the swedesplaining, @speculativexenolinguist
. u.u
– now you’ve shat in the blue cupboard
Actual phrase: Nu har du skitit i det blå skåpet.
As far as a I know, this one dates back to ye olde times, where you’d store the night pot in a cupboard by the bed. In the kitchen area, you had another fancier cabinet (blue, for example, is fancy, maybe some flowers painted on there, pretty stuff) where you kept the “china” to eat on. So to say you’ve shat in the blue cupboard means you’ve made a huge mistake – like using your dinner china for going poo-poo in.
– the taste is like the butt (divided)
Actual phrase:Smaken är som baken – delad
Literally means that just the way the butt is split into two ass-cheeks, so peoples’ tastes and preferences may be divided. The last part of the idiom is often left out since everyone knows what it is.
– there’s no cow on the ice
Actual phrase:Det är ingen ko på isen.
A cow that’s gotten lost from the pasture and wandered onto the frozen nearby body of water is bad. You may end up with drowned cow. So as long as there’s no cow on the ice, whatever you need to do isn’t really in a hurry. If there WAS a cow on the ice, you’d be in a rush to fix it before it got worse, though.
– i sense owls in the marsh
Actual phrase:Jag anar ugglor i mossen
It means to suspect foul play (fowl play, ha, see it works in English, too), that something’s not quite right. Since I didn’t know how it originated, I’ll leave you with the wisdom of Wikipedia – it’s originally a Danish idiom where the owls were actually wolves (which makes more sense, something creepy’s about) that got mistranslated into owls because apparently unbaptised children who died out of wedlock turned into owly marsh-spirits-… you know, that’s fucked up creepy, too. That, and I now feel a very strong urge to incorporate cursed owl-featured child-zombies of the marshes into like ALL my original stories. Anyway. Moving on.
– to walk like a cat around hot porridge
Actual phrase:Att gå som katten kring het gröt.
Circling but evading an issue, being reluctant to bring something up. Porridge was often served with butter and milk, which were tasties for cats. But the porridge was too hot, so the cat would just slink around, waiting for it to cool down. So evading something until, preferably, someone else brings it up or it goes away. Like the heat of the porridge.
– don’t paint the devil on the wall
Actual phrase:Måla inte fan på väggen
This is so visually poetic. It means you shouldn’t invite trouble, or borrow misery. Things might just work out fine, so if you start painting up vivid scenarios of everything that COULD go wrong, you may end up screwing things up for yourself. Don’t.
– to be out biking
Actual phrase: Nu är du helt ute och cyklar
Means to be completely and utterly wrong, way off topic, making no sense. Like being out biking and getting yourself utterly lost. Which happens faster if you’re biking than walking? Or something.
– cake on cake
Actual phrase: tårta på tårta
Literally means to stack one cake on top of another. Ie doing something to extreme excess, exaggerating, too much of any one thing. Is often used about language taking a turn for the purpler – you needn’t describe the polar bear to be furry and white, it’s a polar bear, they’re ALWAYS furry and white, kinda thing.
Finally, because no post about Swedish is complete without it, I shall add on my very favourite Swedish insult: Skitstövel. It literally means shit-boot, and I think that’s beautiful.
Also that is NOT what I expected “the taste is like the butt” to mean.
1 .Let her wear her red lipstick. It makes her feel beautiful and sexy at the same time. Respect it as well, don’t you dare smudge it. But when you get behind closed doors, don’t stop her from painting a masterpiece on your skin with her lips.
2. Don’t let her go to sleep without hearing your voice.
3. Flowers are never ever a bad idea, even when you don’t have a reason for giving them.
4. Wash her hair in the shower. You have no idea how relaxing it is.
5. Reassure her you love her. She’ll always worry about you leaving, you’ll learn why.
6. She’ll talk about her past when she’s ready, don’t push it.
7. Telling her she’s beautiful never hurts.
8. Give in sometimes even when you shouldn’t. She’s fought her whole life, it’s the last thing she wants to do.
9. Get drunk and stay in. She’ll spend most of her time confessing how much she loves you, and the rest of the night showing you.
10. She likes when you rub her back, but don’t touch her feet.
11. When she shaves her legs insist on feeling them.
12. She likes to talk about books, and loves when you write poetry about the color of her hair.
13. She hates to repeat herself, so listen closely.
14. Tell her stories about when you first fell for her, she loves to hear them.
15. Let her know when you’re having a bad day, not only will she appreciate the warning, she’ll do all she can to make it better.
16. When you count your blessings, count her twice. You really are so lucky to have her in your life.
JainaSolo1994 